Babies Born June 1st - 15th 2008

[amyhunz]

Yes I've also tested without the wrap with not much success (short sleeps, long time to settle). I'm holding off until I really need to (i.e. rolling around in cot).

Thanks for the advice girls...

[Mirandabelle]

Skye - Zeke's skull plates are fusing prematurely and his brain will run out of room to grow if it's not remedied. They're not 100% sure what they'll be doing, we're waiting for an MRI to confirm, but they will be breaking and re-setting his skull, probably with separators to increase the space his brain has to grow. I'm ok with not knowing all the details right now, because until the Doctors can know, there's too many possibilities and info to read into and get stressed over.

Amy - Zeke is wrapped to sleep too, and I am beginning to wrap him more loosely so it falls off/comes undone as he sleeps, and it no longer bothers him when it does. Maybe you can try something similar... He still has to be wrapped to get to sleep most nights though, and I'm fine with that, and don't bother wrapping him if he drifts off w/out it. Sorry I'm no help, I'm happy to go with whatever works being a SAHM, and able to rock him to sleep whenever I need!

[MummyPig]

Hi Skye How are Cammi's little gums? I bet they're really sore. I keep reading that babies don't really get bothered by teething, that it's usually something else like a development milestone, at the same time that causes the probs. I just don't believe it! Freyja seems to have really sore gums and I'm going to take out shares in Hylands Teething Tablets!

Miranda - I'm not so concerned now. Last time it just disappeared completely (seriously, no milk and no let down, no chance to express ), but this time it seems to be okay (so far!). I felt sorry for Freyja tonight having no solids and decided I could stop worrying and give her some - she stuffed herself and ate a whole jar or sweet potato, then cried when I said it was done. I had to go and get another jar and gave her some fruit, thinking she'd only have a couple of spoons and be full, but she ate that all as well!!

I hadn't realised why Zeke was having surgery until you posted there. How do they know that his skull plates are fusing early? Just curious as Freyja has only ever had the tiniest little soft spot at the front and I was worried about her brain not having room to develop, but all the docs etc keep telling me it's fine.

Hey again Amyhunz - you're right about it being hard being a first time mum. I was completely lacking in confidence over my own judgement until I came on BellyBelly and now I'm a lot more secure as a mum. Still confused by all the contradictory advice for abolutely everything though!!

As for the wrapping thing, you will probably know when Grace doesn't want to be wrapped as she'll wriggle and complain loudly when you try it. You could always try putting her in a sleeping sack (gro bag) as an interim measure and see how that goes. Or like Leesha said, just wait and see! I stopped wrapping Freyja when we moved here (about 4 months) because she simply became too big for the sheet I had with me to use. She likes her sleep sack and it doesn't stop her from putting her legs in the air or rolling over

Gotta go - Pizza's here!!

[Mirandabelle]

Kerry - I know! They always say that babies aren't worried by teething but why do so many babies cry and then calm down when they're given a teething ring or some bonjela?

It sounds like Freyja was HUNGRY! Zeke already knows what 'last bite' means, and starts to get upset when I say it. He doesn't actually want more food, just that he really enjoys eating, and doesn't want that to finish.

We were clued into the fact Zeke's head wasn't growing right because he has a very large head circumfrence, and because they kept such a watchful eye on it, regular measurements, xrays etc, they were able to pick right away when the plates began to fuse. His head is also 'lopsided' as in, the left sticks out more at the back than the right, it's all a bit complicated, but thankfully because the nurses were so watchful, we're able to fix it quickly before he has any serious learning or health issues.

I'm trying to wean Zeke from wrapping too, he's beginning to wake himself up when he wants to move around but can't, but he still finds it very hard to sleep w/out a wrap. His sleeping sack was a miracle till he outgrew it. Amy - I suggest giving one a try!

[HotKim]

Hello all!

Haven't posted in a while but all is well. It's been great to read that all the mums and babes are growing nicely.

Nate started solids at around 4 months. I make all his food at home and he has about 175-200ml of veg a day. He doesn't mind Farex at all but was very keen on the pear and apple I tried him on last week. All that sucrose definitely hit the spot He is getting around on the floor by rolling and commando crawling. Just today Miss 12 realised that if you stand Nate on a hard surface he stamps his feet up and down alot. She had a great laugh making him 'run' up and down the dining table. If you stand him in one place he looks like a miniature Michael Flatley

He's still waking regularly for night feeds which is hard. My other three were sleeping thru by now. He no longer fits in the baby bath so showers with me. Never swaddled him, or the other children but probably for the best as they were/are all tummy sleepers.

We're still b/fing and I still enjoy it. I'll be sad when we stop.

Miranda - hope everything goes well for Zeke's op.

[Mirandabelle]

Wow.. Nate's eating well! Making your own food is great isn't it? Even though you can read the ingredients on jars and there's never any additives, you always know just what has gone into your own food... not to mention it's cheaper!

Zeke still wakes twice overnight too... he's not waking up properly for his 1am feed anymore, but he still wants it. I'm trying to shorten it as he mostly sleeps while he nurses to see if he can do w/out it, and eventually stop waking. Because he doesn't wake properly for it, I'm beginning to think waking at that time is just a pattern.

His surgery is not yet scheduled. We're waiting to have an MRI done, and they're massively booked out. (They're only 1 of 2 hossies in Vic that do infant MRI)

We're still BFing although we're supplementing (or comp feeding really, he gets a top up after each BF) and I don't see myself stopping anytime soon. I really want to keep BFing especially thru his surgery as he's likely to lose a lot of weight immediately after.

We went to storytime at our local library yesterday - he loved it! If there's one in your area, you shoudl check it out. Even if our LO's are too young to be really thrilled by the stories, it's great for us to get out of the house, especially those who are SAHMs!

[HotKim]

Yes he eats well and I'm happy to make his food at home, so much cheaper than buying and not that much hassle. I don't know why I stopped with the two older boys! Last night I made the decision to start giving him breaskfast as well as his usual dinnertime feed. He wasn't that interested this morning but I'll try again and see how he goes.

I've thought about trying to comfort Nate through his second 'wake up' but I'm usually so tired then I just get the 'cans' out and let him feed.

I have to admit, I've made a mess of meeting other mums since I had Nate. I've made dates for coffee or just meets but I never go. The MCHN sent me info for Mothers Groups which I promised I'd go to but didn't. I returned a psoitive test for the PND test they make you do at 2 months so fudged it a bit at 4 months to escape scrutiny. I know I'm suffering a bit from depression and a lot from loneliness but I can't make myself get out of the house. And I just can't bring myself to get out there and make nice. I've tried telling hubby but he really doesn't understand anxiety or depression.

And now I'm sitting here because as much as I tell myself it doesn't bother me that I have no friends here, it does. And I feel like a sook.

I'm sure it's just a phase....I'll get over it, right?

[Mirandabelle]

Kim - I'm sorry you're feeling like that. I know it's hard to want to get out sometimes with a new baby, you're tired, overworked and the last thing you want to do is have to appear presentable in public, but even getting out in the fresh air for a bit can really help with your situation... try and make a 1/2 hour each day for "garden play", and if you really feel weepy there are plenty of good support services out there too.

Not trying to bang on too much really, but if you get some help it will pass a lot sooner for you.

BIG HUGS Kim, I really hope that you can feel better soon.

[amyhunz]

Hi all,

Just wanted to pop in and offer some encouragment to you Kim. I too tested positive for PND and was prescribed AD. I haven't as yet filled the script because I want to pursue meetings with a psyc first. I'm booked to start those in early Dec. I can't imagine how hard it must be to get out of the house when you have other children to take care of as well. My PND has been related to the lack of support I've had since Gracie's birth. We were living in a very remote farming community miles from family and friends when I had her. Our local Dr was the Flying Doctors! We've just moved again to a slightly bigger, but still country town, so I'm going through the process of finding new friends/ support network again!

I was married, quit full time work, moved to the country, had a baby, moved again - all in less than 2 years. Anyway, just wanted to say I hope that you can talk to someone like a counsellor who can validate your feelings.

Lots of love!!!

[MummyPig]

Hi girls!

I haven't been online all week and just saw your posts Kim and Amy. I suffered from clinical depression for many, many years and was concerned I was going to suffer PND. Although I am escaping it so far, I can really sympathise with what you are both going through.

When I was depressed my emotions were a total roller-coaster - I'd be ecstatic, then I'd burst into tears for no reason. I would have a right go at my poor hubbie, but it was like I was looking down on myself and their was this little sane voice going "what are you doing?!", yet I couldn't stop myself. I was constantly tired and couldn't get myself out of bed. Nor did I want to have to socialise with anyone other than my hubby, and that was mostly a desire for comfort hugs constantly, which I would cry and take personally if he didn't oblige!

I cannot imagine how you are both managing to cope with those feelings when you have children, especially babies, to care for and I think you must be the strongest, bravest women around.

My hubbie is away right now (2 weeks with work ) and I am missing his support in the evenings. Freyja has decided that going to sleep is not for her if there's no daddy to tuck her in and read her bedtime story, so it takes me a couple of hours to get her down. I have no 'me' time and I'm at the end of a really nasty chesty cough I've had for 2 weeks, so rundown and exhausted. Plus she is up a minimum of 3 times a night for feeds, so I never get more than 4-5 hours a night.

Today she was tired before 10am, I put her down and spent the 3 hours until 1pm resettling and trying every trick in the book to get her to sleep - I may chop her hands off as everytime she rubs her eyes, she knocks her dummy out and the screaming starts anew!

For a while before we came to Oz I was convinced that the baby didn't like me, as my hubbie could calm her instantly and I couldn't. When we were 2 hours into todays screaming session, with no let up in sight, I felt that again and could feel myself getting angry with her and my voice starting to raise. I felt so awful I sat there with her thrashing around in my arms, screaming and contorting, her little face looking at me as if she was begging me to help her, and I bawled my eyes out.

Now she is calm, asleep, I've had my lunch and am sitting in the back-garden on the laptop, listening to the cicada's and feel relaxed.

Miranda is right - even if you can't bring yourselves to socialise yet, get outside and play with the kids, even if it's just to sit and read to them or chat, go for a short walk and marvel at the trees, the birds, the twenty million Aussie ants running around like they're on speed, or go for a coffee with the bub - just sit by the window in the coffee shop and watch people. In the UK, it's common for hospitals to run regular 'pram-walks' where you can help combat PND by going for a walk with your baby and a group of other parents. I wonder if they have anything like that near you guys?

I joined a mother's group, but don't feel like I fit in as I joined months later than it started, I am the only person from the UK, they're all young (I'm only 32 but they're in the early 20s most of them!), plus I can't drive so it can be a long walk to get there and I just can't be bothered making the effort when we have nothing in common.

Instead, I walk into town twice a week and have lunch in a little Italian coffee shop. I really enjoy the walk (bar the flies!) and Freyja is usually asleep by the time we get there. If not, I have a walk around the shops with her until she is. Then I get 40mins to sit, eat my lunch, read a book, watch the shoppers, have a coffee and just chill.
Then we do a bit more wandering around (I enjoy chatting more to the woman in the pet shop or in the 2nd hand baby store than the mother's group!), before we head home and Freyja normally has her 2nd sleep.

The fresh air, sunlight and exercise do me good, I don't have to socialise if I don't feel like it, I get to have a good meal and a hot cup of coffee (for a change!) and Freyja actually has a daytime nap. Works well for us, so maybe worth a go?

[amyhunz]

I had to laugh as I was reading your post! My emotions are exactly how you described...calm one minute, phyco the next!!! My poor husband - what he must think sometimes! I'm blessed to have such a great partner and support.

Decided I need to get out more so I joined a Gymbaroo class today and I'm trying out a Mother's Group tomorrow. Didn't enjoy PlayGroup much last week - no one talked to me and there were no other babies. Anyway, that's ok. Gymbaroo was great so I think I'll stick with that.

Sounds like Freyja is a party animal or a socialite maybe?? :-) Gracie's day sleeps can vary but she's doing solid nights so I really can't complain. Getting that sleep makes the days managable.

Anyway, thanks for your post!

[amyhunz]

Hi everyone,
Can I take a quick survey to see how much sleep your bubs do in the day?

I'm trying to figure out if I'm expecting too much sleep of my LO. At the moment, her awake time is still only about 1.5hrs, obviously more if we're out and about. Her total day sleep can vary between 3hrs and 5hrs depending on the happenings of the day. I supposed a normal day if we stay at home is 4-4.5hrs. She's taking longer to settle off to sleep over the past couple of days and I'm wondering if it's a phase or whether I need to extend her 'up' time (???)

Would love to know what your LO's are doing! Thanks...

[MummyPig]

Hi Amy

Day time sleep is something I'm interested in too. I understand that all babies have different patterns (if they have them at all!), some are really good nappers, some are terrible, some sleep in only batches of 40 mins (one sleep cycle) and others will sleep for hours apparently. I've read it should be on average 15 hours sleep out of 24, with 10 at night and the rest during the day in naps. Obviously that varies by baby and day to day. Also, I've read that for some people keeping their babies awake longer works, but for others it just leads to an overtired baby and an overstressed mum.

How are we ever supposed to know if what we're doing is right?

I've spent a few weeks trying to track her sleepy times and all I can tell is that Freyja is one of the crappy nappers. She tends to sleep for 40mins IF you can even get her down. Some days, no matter how tired she is or how well you read her sleepy cues, she just will not go to sleep. I have had many days were most of it was spent dealing with a screaming, overtired baby who is hyperalert and still won't go to sleep.

Occassionally I will be able to resettle her. More often than not she will seem to be completely wide awake and playful when I go through, so I think, "ooh, she's had enough sleep for once!", then within a few minutes it becomes obvious that she is still tired and I have to deal with her being grumpy until I cam try and put her down again.

She tends to need to sleep after being awake for an hour and a half like you mention Grace does, but sometimes it's only 40 mins, others she can go several hours and these periods don't seem to relate to how much napping she's done. Although the longer periods do tend to coincide with us being out and about, or her daddy being home. Very occassionally, perhaps once a week at most, she will sleep for several hours at a time - it's bliss!!

I was told yesterday by another mum that her daughter was crap at napping until they upped her solids to 3 meals a day, including a big brekkie. Freyja had a big brekkie today, which she loved, but it made no difference to her sleeping. She woke up at 6am today and has only had two 40 min naps since, despite a cumulative total of several hours of trying to get her to sleep.

Also, since Freyja learnt how to turn onto her tummy, settling her day or night have been impossible. She will just be nodding off when all of a sudden, she turns onto her tum for no reason and then of course she starts howling. She also now seems to favour sleeping on her side - all the easier for turning onto her tum accidentally! At least it has allowed us to start patting her bum to help her settle (give that a go btw, I was amazed at how well it works), rather than allowing her to hold our hands to her face and pat herself on the head with them. She has a death like grip so you're there for the duration when she does that.

Problem is, no matter how good your baby is at napping or night sleeping, it all goes out the window when they hit a development point - I'm now convinced Freyja is having a 6 month long one!

Freyja is now going to sit in her high chair and watch mummy doing the housework because she is still awake. Perhaps I can bore her to sleep?

[amyhunz]

Hi Kerry,

Thanks so much for your reply. I know what you mean about the confusion re: are we doing it right?!! Don't you just wish they could tell you when they're tired!!

Well, a few people have told me that kids that need less sleep are often intelligent so maybe you have a genious on your hands :-)

I think with Gracie I've developed a thick skin of late. Sometimes it can take up to an hr for her to settle and these days I just go about doing whatever. When she was younger, I'd sit nervously waiting with baited breathe to see if she was going to settle to sleep and then at the 40min mark pray that she didn't wake completely. Ohh...how we traumatise ourselves! These days I just go with it a bit more. If she wakes at 40mins, I leave her for up to 30mins (unless she's screaming the house down which she rarely does) and then if she doesn't re-settle I get her up and make sure I put her to bed 1.5hrs (or less) the next time.

At night, if she wakes, I go in and check her and if she's not hot/cold, out of her wrap, head up against the bars, etc then I leave her. Sometimes it can take an hr for her to re-settle but patting, rocking etc never worked for her.

Anyway, it'll be interesting to see what the others have to say...thanks for affirming that sleeping is different for every bub and isn't easy!!

[Mirandabelle]

Zeke is a fairly average napper, he has 2 or 3 short naps during the day that last about 30-45mins and a longish one that is about 1-2 hours. I just kinda go with the flow and start trying to get him down when he is tired. When all else fails I just feed him and snuggle... at least that way he is resting.

When he wakes at night, it's usually for food so he eats, and goes straight back to sleep... which is fantastic, he's rarely up for more than 20 minutes!

I've been packing a bit more into his days now, so he's sleeping a little longer for naps... but has made no improvement on the night sleeping, which is what I'm really trying to work on, at least dropping the 2am feed. He doesn't really seem to want it, so I'm just trying to comfort him first, and most of the time it's working, occasionally he is still hungry, but most of the time he's woken out of pure habit... cheeky boy!

[skye+cammi]

hi girls,

i havent been on in a while,i think cammi is going throu a long development point and she just got over a virus she wont be put down to play for 5mins the past week its stating to drive me nuts...lol hope it passes soon...as for her sleeping she only sleeps 40min at a time and only has 3 maybe 4 sleeps throu the day...she is a excellent sleeper of a night we go to bed bout 8:30-9 she gets up at around 4 but only for a feed and is asleep within 5min but i co-sleep she wakes again round 9-10am..its good to hear how other bubs sleep...

[leesha]

Hi all hope everyone is well.......
Taj is a great sleeper during the day!
His daily sleep pattern is usually up btween 6am-7am...has a feed and a play and about an hour and a half later goes down for a sleep. This is usually at least an hour sometimes 3!!!
Up again for a feed and more play time then about 2pm he goes back down for a sleep for about an hour and a half sometimes a bit longer.
Once his up at 3.30 I keep him up and bath time is 5.30pm then a feed then bed by 7pm and he has been sleeping till 4am then waking for a feed and half an hour later back asleep till 6-7am!!
He dropped his 2am feed himself about a week ago which has been great!!! More Sleep!!!

He is still not interested in solids so he is sleeping a lot for this age and just being BF(Ebm and bottle fed due to his cleft lip) So I don't think eating solids has anything to do with how they sleep, it just means they will probably cut out a few milk feeds and have more sleep or nap time!!

He isn't always routine tho and these times can vary a bit and also depending on wether I am at home or if I have gone out! I have noticed tho that he needs a morning and an afternoon sleep definately!!! We play heaps during the day and lots of tummy time really tires him out!!

My neice is 8 months old and she and Taj have almost the same sleep patterns and she has been on solids for 3 months!! It's weird how they all vary in what they do and when they do it!!!

I week and 3 days till Taj's surgery...Agggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[Mirandabelle]

I totally agree... it's amazing how different all our babies are... all the different patterns they have and yet they were born within a few days of each other.

Leisha... I will be keeping my fingers crossed especially tight for you over the next couple of days. I hope that Taj's surgery goes well, and he recovers quickly!