Parenting After Miscarriage or Loss June '08 #2

[Flowerchild]

Welcome to Parenting after Miscarriage or Loss. In this thread you will find women who are navigating the sometimes difficult but joyous challenge of parenting after saying goodbye. This can throw up many challenges and in here you will find friendship and a safe place to share your experiences.

If you have any concerns within the thread please email/ PM any of the following Moderating/Admin team for this forum (all emails & PM's are treated equally & confidentially) :-

Niliac
Mistyfying and
Flowerchild

Their email addresses can be found here.

Please note - To receive thread notfications click the "thread tools" button at the top of this post and click "Subscribe to Thread" there is no need to post in order to get notifications. You will find the previous thread here.

Here's wishing each and every one of you, a happy and easy going parenting journey after a difficult ride to get there! You will find the previous thread HERE

[Janie]

Deb that is too funny about the bird! I didn't see the wild weather, I hope your place is okay.

I too am so jealous, and wishing I was in Sydney! Mostly because I love home made lasagne I guess it would be nice to meet you girls too

[Flowerchild]

I tried to resuscitate the poor bird but cpr on a butcherbird is not my forte... So we had a little funeral and didn't speak to Pat the Cat for the rest of the day...
Yeah our house was fine - we lost some mighty big tree branches and the chookies stopped laying. DS was devastated that the tomato plants got flooded out of the ground. Did I mention that I went absolutely bloody bonkers after 8 hours with 7 kids under 8????

All is good. I have to do some housework so I need to get off the computer and into the toilet bowl!

[Angel Babies 3]

Spring, no you didn't offend me my dear.
I did the controlled comforting thing with my first child. A paedetrician (can't spell today) friend told me about it. Matt slept wonderfully at first. We had to travel due to work when he was 6 weeks. While we were away he started to sleep all night and have good day sleeps. Had to travel again when he was 5 months and that's when the rot set in. By the time he was 10 months we thought we were going mad we were all so tired. After a week of the settling thing we were all sleeping well and he has done ever since. I never really had to do it again as we really learnt a lot through our friend and never had those problems again because we learnt ways of settling and thankfully all our other kids have benefitted and been great sleepers.

I have heard about the method you described. I don't like the sound of that. Anyone would fall asleep if they were left to cry for hours on end. How upsetting it must be.

Anyway, hope you are well and sleep doesn't allude you too much.
Hugs to you,
Debbie

[Michelle71]

Deb about the cat and the bird. Poor Eva (or was it Immy??) I am going only slightly mad with 1 just under one so I can only imagine 7 under 8 in the rain and no way out was like I really do love the rain and storms - just not too extreme. Hope you are still OK

Janie - I wish you were here too. I'd offer the send the lasagne but I don't think it would travel well in the post Any time you want to visit, let me know. There is still a chance I will be in Melbourne at the start of September so maybe we will get the chance soon.

Oscar is asleep again (and so was I ). We are trying a new way of going to sleep lying down together on the bed and it seems to be working. I can't rock him forever (especially with a growing tummy) so this is the progression to (hopefully) self settling in his cot He took about 30 minutes to settle to sleep last night and less than 15 minutes for the 2 sleeps this morning Now all I need to go if find a way of transferring him to the cot.

[Willow]

Deb - Glad I gave you a giggle, wasn't laughing much myself last night! LOL. But why are you sad? Hope it's nothing more than that poor birdy To say we would love to meet you IRL is a huge understatement. Not sure how everyone else feels, but to me, you and Michelle are the matriachs of this little 'family'. Maybe one day....

Having one of those days where I shouldn't have turned this computer on cause between BB and emails, I can't seem to get off it!

REALLY going now!

[jlk]

Hi everyone **waves**

Lynn & Spring - thanks guys, It's coming up to what was Storms due date, the 1st time I got to the due date I kept thinking 'I should have my baby now', This year I can't help but think that I should have a 1 year old running around , It just seems to be doing my head in a bit.

[LisaL]

Hello possums,

Jo - sending big hugs your way sweety.

Ladies, a Sydney Soiree sounds like so much fun. I'll be there later this year (October?) so you may have to organise another one just for me

Well quick update from me - im soooo busy, looks like I might have to hire someone and Ive just had a very very tempting offer to go back to work 2 part days and one day from home, for an extra $10K!! Mmmm, need to put my thinking cap on!

On the issue of AF, well as I said last week, it hit full force, BUT I still have it and its very very heavy and lots of clotting (sorry TMI) so not sure what to do and it doesnt look like its going to slow down any time soon. I put in a call to my NP so Im waiting for her to call me back. Should I go drs or just wait for it to stop? I normally have af for about 5 days and medium flow. This is different.

Thanks lovelies,
Hope your all well

[Janie]

I'm having one of those days too Willow.........it doesn't help that I decided to stay home all day to help DS recuperate. My child does not like staying at home all day, he goes stir crazy, and in turn, so do I! But I don't like sharing germs, and given that he has a hacking cough, and snot pouring out of him, I figured no one would want to see him today (we normally go to our ABA meeting on Tuesdays).

Okay, while I was typing that last bit, DS got into the pantry and pulled all my baking goods out. There is now custard powder all over the floor Great. I don't even like custard powder, I just keep it to use in a Nigella chocolate cheesecake that I make. So anyway, staying home all day does not often go down well here. I've resorted to the DVD (so I can eat!), only to find that the DVD that I put in earlier (Bananas) has gone missing! Yep, DS has pulled it out and put it god only knows where, I can't find it to save myself. Anyone would think that I spend NO time with my child. But that's not true, he's just very good at doing things when I'm not paying attention LOL!

Deb, I feel really, really sorry for you, spending all that time with all those kids! I'm sure they're devine, but honestly, that's hard work. Did you sneak a bit of Mother's Little Helper?

Michelle, yes, you MUST come down in September! I would so love to meet you in person

ETA Jo, sending you big hugs It must be such a difficult time for you.

Lisa, good to see you hun! What are you doing that you need to hire someone? I guess see what your NP thinks, but it might be wise to see your Dr. How many days has it been now?

[mako]

Willow LOL at your post hunni. I would have freaked out at the cockroach thing too.DH laughs at me cause I "spray paint" them with insect spray until they are white and can't move. I can't stand them, they make my skin crawl at just the sight let alone standing on one.
I hope L is feeling soooo much better now. I've heard that a reaction to new food should happen within about 15 mins of it being eaten. Not too sure how true that is though.

Lisa If you are worried at all sweety, a trip to the Drs wouldn't hurt.

Michelle Your lasagne sounds yummy. Hope you all have a good time next Wednesday.

Sorry I'm not thinking too straight atm. My Nan is having an op this arv and I'm soooo worried about her. The Drs have told us that this particular op is very very risky especially in a person her age. I'm just hoping she pulls through and is better after it.

BBL

[Spring Angel]

Mako: Oh hun, I really hope your Nan's operation goes perfectly. Sending some *courage vibes* to you and some *stay strong* vibes to your nan.

Deb: you had me in stitches girl. Did Pat the Cat get forgiven? 7 kids under 8, I'd need a stiff drink to get through a day like that. Hey and don't you worry, as soon as I get up there (which should be in a matter of months) we will be catching up. I fancy a drive up your way and whenever you come to the big smoke we will have to catch up. I can't wait to meet you IRL. Just beware, you are going to get a hella hug.

Debbie: Thanks for your email. We had a good night here last night so I guess I just have to remind myself that it won't be like this forever.

Willow: Oh poor little DS. Is he feeling better? I really doubt that a little bit of apple could have that reaction but perhaps hold off on giving it to him again until he is better.

Michelle: Whoo Hoo on DS Oscar sleeping better WTG little man Lasanga sounds great, I'll tell you though I haven't eaten red meat for just over 8 years. I have been thinking for the last few years that I want to try it again soon, but I just haven't yet. I don't want to be making separate meals for me and Oliver. So no pressure (lol) but I think I'll give it a go at your place.

Jo: Birthdays and due dates are bloody tough. I really hope you are doing ok. I'll be thinking of you hun.

Lisa: The job offer sounds awesome, worth thinking about that's for sure. About AF, if you are at all worried just go and get it checked, it can't hurt to ask.

Janie: Your little man sounds like he has a real little personality. I hope the skys clear tomorrow so you can get some out and about time. Hey you'll have to share that cheesecake recipe, it sounds devine.

[~Jayne~]

Hi Girls,

Just letting you know Claudy has an ear infection. Took her to the Dr today after a night of 39.5 temps again & she was actually shaking last night & very unsteady. The Dr hates me, so I will never be seeing him again, but basically told me it's JUST an ear infection. Like you can say that to me when I have been up all night settling a very unhappy & unwell little baby. She has big dark rings under her eyes & just lies on my lap like a little doll. Even he commented on how lethargic she is, but then followed up with it's JUST an ear infection. We JUST had 7 ear infections in 5 months last year & I don't care to do it again.

Anyway, I'm jacked as you can tell, she is so unwell & won't let anybody but me do anything for her. She is a major brat to Alan, has a major hissy spit if he touches her & goes into meltdown mode if he tries to pick her up. She won't even LOOK at him when he's speaking to her & if she looks up & he is in her face she drops her eyes & looks down her nose at him. She is a major snob, even when she is not feeling well!

I just re-read that & I'm not jacked that she is ill, I"m jacked that the Dr said it's JUST an ear infection, complete with a roll of the eyes mind you.

So I will go & lie down while she is asleep. I need my batteries somewhat charged for tonight.

Love Jayne xox

PS _ thank goodness for my Implanon Implant, I think I'd be pregnant with quintuplets by now with Alan home!

[Spring Angel]

That GP sounds like a fool. I wouldn't go back to him either. No wonder you are jacked off.

Oh and about the quituplettes. Having a DH who used to be away for long stretches in the Army I know exactly what you mean

[Willow]

You dirty birdies...

I'm bracing myself for another shocking night...I've already had to resettle him twice . If we do have another night like last night, I'm taking him to the drs tomorrow. Something's up but I can't for the life of me work out what it is...

Jayne - I would be jacked off too....

[Michelle71]

OK - I know I am going to curse myself but DS went to sleep at 6 (5 minutes to settle off to sleep :O) woke at 8ish for a feed then straight back to sleep and is still sleeping. The only problem is that he is asleep in the middle of the queen size bed in the spare room so I am sleeping in the spare room too. Too scared to move him (he might wake up ) and too scared to leave him lying there on his own!! It is a loooonnnnnggggg way to the floor.

Wish me luck - and Jayne, bragging is not allowed Hope Claudy is better soon

[Janie]

Oooh, oooh, wishing you lots of luck Michelle! I hope you get a bewdiful nights sleep

I, on the other hand, have a child on my lap. We first tried to get him to sleep two and a half hours ago. He has screamed blue murder for two hours of that. To the point where we were both getting worried. He could hardly breathe he was so worked up And I'd given him panadol at 8pm, so I don't *think* it's teeth, or anything like that. So anyway, I feel like I'm losing the plot, so my defense mechanism is to sit on bb, and eat chocolate Not good, considering I have to get up at 5.45am I'd better go and have another crack.......wish me luck girls

[LisaL]

How did you go Janie?? I hope he managed to settle.
Michelle - did the little mister stay asleep??
Mako - sweets hope all goes well.
Spring - I hear you on sharing that choc cheescake recipe....c'mon Miss Janie, let us have it!!
Jayne - Maybe you should go to another dr, this one sounds like a total idiot. Hope Claudy is feeling better.

The no sleep monster came to visit us last night, the little miss went down like a dream at 8pm, only to wake up at 9.15 and she stayed up until 11.30. She has had a fever over the last few days and been a bit grizzly, so she was grizzly during the night, I had to get up about 4 times to cover her as she kept wriggling. Well this morning I noticed small red dots all over her tummy and chest area. Called the MCH line and they think she may have rosieola(sp??) so off to the drs for her this arvo.

Other than that I still have AF, but after 7 days of extra heavy flow it seems to have come back down to a normal af. NP thinks its just my body giving itself a good cleanout. Ok. Im happy with that, just hope it goes away by Fri - off to see Sex and the City with my gal pals, gold class at the Casino!! Fingers crossed the little miss is better by then too!

Hope your all well,
Lisa xx

[LisaL]

BTW Janie - Im a town planner and im doing contract work from my home office, but ive got so much coming in, that I cant keep up, and if Im going to go to take this new job offer (working for a state govt appointed panel) I need someone to come in and help with the contract stuff. I dotn want to give it up either as its good money Winning lotto would be good money too.......