Trying to Conceive after Late Loss, Still Birth or Recurrent Miscarriage June '08 #2

[Katiegirl]

8Weeks - I hope you are ok and I am sorry to see that AF has reared her ugly head. Only you and your DH will know when the right time to TTC is. I know someone else mentioned (I think Rozzie but I could be wrong) that sometimes time can increase the fear level. I know my sister who had 2 late losses told me this exact thing when I was doing it tough with the constant spotting after the D&C. She told me that they had allowed too much time to pass since their last angel baby and that fear had made it almost impossible to move forward with the idea of TTC. I really took it to heart and kept on going, even though at times it seemed like the scariest thing in the world (let's face it - it still does seem scary). Look after yourself and just take the time you need.

[MrsRobbo]

Katie and Sue... good luck and I'm crossing everything for happy news! We need some on this board after poor Jo's sad loss.

Jo... I think of you all the time and hope that you are finding the strength you need to get through.

8 weeks... DH and I are having second thoughts about ttc at the moment as well. AF arrived for me yesterday (we weren't ttc last cycle anyway) and I had been really looking forward to it as it is my second since we lost Charlie and my OB said to wait 2 complete cycles. We had initially planned to start ttc next month (we are going on a long overdue holiday and thought it would be a good time). I worked out that my EDD would be Charlie's birthday and thought that would be nice. But now I'm not so sure. I have just started getting my physical strength back and am also starting a new job in October. We have has such a rough couple of years with the MC and then losing Charlie and I am kind of looking forward to taking it easy for a few months. I feel a bit guilty though however i want to be as strong and rested as possible for this next baby so that I will hopefully be able to get some peace of mind during the pregancy that I have done everything I could to give this baby a good chance of surviving to full-term. My OB says I've got nothing to worry about next time round but that's much easier for him to say than for me to do!

Anyway, I just thought it might help to knwo that you aren't the only one who is still struggling a bit with the ttc decision. Good luck with whatever you decide and keep us posted with your progress.

Paula

[Where there's hope]

Hello

Just hoping someone might be able to recommend a reputable accupuncturist specialising in fertility in the Illawarra or South Sydney area.

It might be a stretch, but hoping they may be able to assist with egg quality.

Thanks for any help

WTH

[Katiegirl]

Hi all - had the Ob appointment and GD test this morning. All went well with the Ob - he once again didn't do a scan (how disappointing) and I am sure he is trying to wean us off them. He did check the heartbeat which was good and the baby is still head down same as last time - he also said my belly is measuring correct. So even though I didn't see our little one, I am trying to just take it all as good news. Then we had the GD test and I must be a freak but I didn't mind the drink! I know most people hate it but I didn't find it too bad. No nausea but it did make me very tired.

Talk more later - off for a nap.

[sryan]

Hi all

Hoping everyone is having a good day.

Katie - for a good result at the OB, must be reassuring to hear that beautiful heartbeat. Can I ask what GD stands for, is that Glucose Tolerance Test???

Where there's hope - sorry I cant help you. But I wish you all the best in TTC Journey. Have you been to a naturopath??? I have found my naturopath to be useful with things like that.

8 Weeks and Mrs Robbo. You will know in your heart when you are ready TTC. I find that with me, I need to get back into TTC and even if I mentally say that I am having time off, I know when I am ovulating and I still try......

Thanks Rozzie for the sticky bubba vibes... how are you going?

Jo, thinking of you.....

A big hello to Tildy, Jen, Hammi, Helen - hope you are all doing well.

Well I had a blood test this morning to see how far I am to ovulating.... levels are increasing and have to go back Friday (normally ovulate on day 13 (which is Sat). I would say that mid to end of next week I will be having the frostie put in. it survives the unfreezing process. I found out today that it is a day 6 embreyo.

Also went to naturopath and she has me on a plan for when the little frostie is put in, to make sure my progesterone levels are good.

So it is full steam ahead.....

xxx Sue xxx

[Rozzie27]

Hi all,

I feel like crap today- physically, that is, which ironically is a good thing! Just had a long nap and feel washed out and queasy. Every little smell sets me off. Haven't vomited yet, last time vomiting started at 7 weeks so we'll see. So glad I still have a few weeks off. We have a scan on Thnursday so looking forward to that.

Sue, I really have my fingers crossed for you, hoping you get a good result.

Where there's hope- My parents live in Bulli, I'll ask them if they know anyone who uses accupuncture when they visit next week. They have lots of friends there so maybe they can get a recommendation.

Katie, bummer about the scan, though must have been nice to hear the H/B. I always think that with the GT test it's a shame you can't pick your own sugary drink you like!

Tildy, how are you going? Any change?

Jo, I hope you're doing as well as you can under the circumstances. Thinking of you.

Hi to everyone else, good luck with your BFPs this month.

Love Rozzie

[Tildy]

My spotting seems to have come to a halt. After the exam in the ER on Sunday it turned into dark brown/black guck (it seriously looked like I just hadn't washed for ages -- sorry TMI!) and by this morning it has tapered off to almost nothing. Just some tiny spots of dried up black crud. :P

I'm right there with you, Rozzie, as far as feeling crap. I'm up in Stockholm for work today, and lordy lordy, was the 3-hour train ride ever fun. I was breathing methodically through my nose and eating from a box of crackers I'd picked up at the train station thinking "don't throw up, don't throw up, don't throw up!" Reading made me feel sick, looking out the window made me feel sick, closing my eyes made me feel sick! Then suddenly -- despite the fact that I went to bed at 8pm last night in preparation for having to be in a taxi at 6 this morning -- I just fell asleep, right there on the train, WOOSH! Asleep. Good thing I set an alarm just in case. I woke up feeling much better, but with a nice pain in my neck!

Now we've just had a coffee break, and they have this great roof terrace here that they take their coffee on. It's a beautiful sunny summer day in Stockholm, so guess if I didn't nod off again? Hehe.

So feeling like crap, but happy to be, and a little less worried, but not so much less worried. It's hard to be optimistic, but girls... I so want this baby. I don't feel I need any more "what doesn't kill you makes you stronger" experiences just now.

Sue - best of luck for your frostie! I'll cross all my fingers and toes!

Katie - Welcome to the third trimester, I've been meaning to say! It's a great milestone for you, hon.

WTH and MrsRobbo - I understand why you might be ambivelent about starting to TTC again. And starting a new job -- that IS tough, I can attest. I started a new job in March, which I had accepted back in December before I was pregnant. I had my M/C at the end of April... and believe me, even though I left my old job because my old boss was a psychopath, I was NOT happy to be all caught up in learning a brand-new one. It added to the emotional strain for sure. However, keep in mind when I say that that I went from being a (very good) high school teacher to a (still very helpless) computer programmer, so it wasn't a small change.

Hammi -- How are you doing?

Jo - still thinking of you every day.

To everyone else -- from Stockholm!

[Where there's hope]

Rozzie27 - Thanks. Recommendations always carry so much further than dodgy advertising.

[jo76]

hi everyone,
have copied message from other forum, just wanted to pop in...
first, i really want to thank you for all your thoughts. I have recieved much more affection from the people in this site compared to those in person in my life. It took 5 days for dhs family to acknowledge by sending a card or flowers. i feel incredibly alone this time and feel so betrayed. I can't believe my body or life would allow us to go through this again. I heard from the midwife from monash and i am seeing them on the 2nd of october. Seems like forever but she said it is only 7 weeks and they need that long to do everything. From what she said they are pulling out all stops to try and find an answer although at this stage it won't help in dealing with the enormity of what we have lost, and they have repeatedly said we may still fall under the umbrella of people that will never know a cause. I also see my OB next mon for a check up visit, i know last time with jack he was concerned about borderline post natal depression due to my eating and sleeping habits. (i did'nt do much of either for ) I obviously won't get any info from him i think it is just a early visit to see where i am at emotionally and physically. His receptionist said as soon as i arrive they will push me through in front of everyone to see him, so hopefully i don't have to wait in the waiting room too long.
So thanks again, i am lurking and have wanted to post and not post, really want to stay around as i really need to feel inspired to give it one last go eventually and i really want to keep hearing the happy news from you all!

tildy -pls take care of yourself! At least you managed to rest on the train but i ma very happy to hear you body is starting to give you a bit of a break!!!!
rozzie -same to you as above! Funny how in some ways we consider the countdown to M/S a good thing? I think even tho we feel crap we know it is for a wonderful reason!
sue -crossing fingers and toes for you!
mrs robbo and 8 weeks - ttc is a huge step and you guys will both know when you are ready. You'll just know, each day is different...don't put too much pressure on yourselves...good luck!

love and hugs a 1000 times guys!
x jo

[Hammi]

First of all, the biggest, warmest and most heartfelt for the amazing Jo. I'm sorry to hear that DH's family did not respond to Madison Rose's birth the way you expected. But we've learnt by now that other's reactions and words are a reflection of themselves, not us or our angels, right? My DH's entire family have never actively mentioned my Hamish at all. Not once. Even to the point of not saying anything when I talk about him. Freaks.

Now, for Katie... for landing in your third trimester. I am so excited for you. Hope the glucose test thingy comes back all good. Don't worry about the scan, that HB is all you need to hear. Plus you bub's kicking away for you, isn't she?

Rozzie and Tildy, I remember that M/S feeling and I totally envy you guys for it because that grossness comes with a tiny beating heart in your tummies. for you both. Tildy, black gunk is good. Your body's probably just getting rid of old stuff stagnated in there to make way for new beginnings.

Sue, I hope this Saturday is the conception of your special little one

Helen, I am thinking of you today. It's our boys' EDD today. How are you coping? The other girls were right, the lead up is actually much worse than the actual day. I feel quite fine. In fact, I feel like I'm going to survive!

How's this for special? I have AF for the second time this month. First time was just browny black stuff (gunk, Tildy would say) which my acupuncturist said was stagnated blooded that my special "plugging" probably expelled. I know, I am gross. This time, exactly 14 days from the last AF, it's the normal bright red stuff. I don't care, my body will work itself out.

Jo, maybe we can TTC at the same time towards the end of this year?

Where there's hope, my acupuncturist is SUPER. Her name is Ruth Mayroz. She's based in the Blue Mountains but I see her in Alexandria. Is that too far for you?

[Where there's hope]

Hammi - darn! I was in the Blue Mountains last week!! I guess I could make it up to Alexandria for an initial consult if no one can recommend one closer. Thanks for thinking of me.

[Katiegirl]

Hammi - thinking of you today on Hamish's EDD. I will say a prayer for your angel and you and your DH. I hope all is well and good to hear that a proper AF has arrived - it is all about a new journey. Have you done anything special to remember Hamish? Glad to hear that the lead-up has been worse than the actual day, that is exactly how I felt as well.

Helen - also thinking of you on your angel's EDD. I hope you are okay and managing to get through what can be a very difficult time.

Jo - I responded in the Preg thread but once again you are a wonderful and caring woman and mother and an inspiration for all. The fact that you can ask after all of us when your heart is breaking shows your compassion. I hope we can all offer this same compassion and support in return. Madison is never far from my thoughts and prayers.

[Rozzie27]

Jo,

so sorry again for the loss of your baby girl. I hope that the tests can reveal a cause and that when you feel up to trying again you can do it with confidence, maybe with extra treatment.

Lan and Helen- hugs to you on your angels' due date. So difficult but maybe passing this milestone will help you face the future. I'm hoping that's the case for me in a week.

Lan, your cycle sounds a bit like mine was, I had a half period and then a real one (real as in it was sooooo heavy) two and a half weeks later. I got pregnant on the second one so hopefully you're back in swing.

Love to all,

Rozzie

[sryan]

Hi all,

Jo, firstly you are an amazing woman. Thinking of all of us when you are going through a horrific time. I am so sorry about your DH family (unfortunately you can not pick family!!!)

Helen & Hammi, wanting to give you lots of for yesterday.

Rozzie - how is the morning sickness going????

Katie - how are you feeling??? and congratulations in getting to your second trimester... yippee

Well for me, I am in for another blood test tomorrow to check ovulation. I am so close I can feel it!!!! Normally I ovulate on day 13, so I will be that tomorrow.

So from 'O' Day, I will be putting the little frostie in around 5 - 6 days later. I am so hoping that I get a sticky one this time and eventually get to hold a little miracle in my arms. I am stressing a little, as I am 38 and don't have much time. We have been TTC for nearly 3 years now.... Oh well got to keep trying....

Hoping everyone is having a good day.

xxx Sue xxx

[Rozzie27]

Well I hate to add to the bad news but things don't look that good for me.

Sorry for the cut and paste.
We were just at the OB's for a scan and although the baby was measuring correctly (roughly, the picture was fuzzy) there was no clear heartbeat. There was sort of a flicker but he couldn't lock on to it to get a rate.

So I have to have blood tests and if they aren't too negative another scan in a week or so. I know for sure my dates are right and at this stage the doctor said the heartbeat is usually very easy to find.

DH is not worried, because this time he doesn't have a bad feeling, which he apparently did as soon as I told him I hadn't felt a movement in a day with Edward. He also thinks the picture was so fuzzy that the doctor may not have been positioning it in the right place.

Anyway, I will have blood taken tomorrow then ring up on Monday to find out the results. I suppose I don't feel too bad, even though I was very positive about this one I guess at least we got pregnant very quickly and if need be we can do it again. I don't like this in between place though, I just wish I knew one way or another.

Rozzie

[Tildy]

Sorry to hear that you have to worry, Rozzie. But it doesn't sound like bad news yet. Keep us updated, and I'll be anxiously waiting to see how your test turns out.

Sue, for your upcoming frostie.

Lan and Helen, I hope your EDDs have left you with a little more peace. It must have been a tough day or week.

It's lovely to keep watching Katie's ticker go up and up and up!

Jo, thanks for the encouragement. I'm trying my best to sleep every minute I can -- or rather, I don't have to try so hard, as it comes pretty naturally. I want the time to just pass; I feel like I'm in quite a numb sort of limbo right now.

Here's hoping for some BFPs this month; we need some good news!

[Hammi]

Rozzie and Tildy


:goodluck2:

[jo76]

rozzie!
i am sending you so many sticky vibes! Fingers and toes crossed for some great news!!!!
x jo