To VBAC or not to VBAC

[Amanda_Jane78]

I have read the other threads here and am still confused.

I really want to try VBAC. It has been my intention from the start of the pregnancy.

When I was pregnant with DD, I was told I would NEVER be able to deliver naturally. I have Pulmonary Stenosis (a minor heart condition) and was told I had a small pelvis and a tailbone injury which meant my birth canal was not wide enough to deliver a baby. Due to these reasons, I had a c/section.

Through this entire pregnancy I have been given totally different pieces of advice. 4 weeks ago, I had a registrar (after viewing my medical history) book my c/section only to be told by the consulting Dr he didn't think I needed to do that. I've had two midwives and my GP tell me that I would need to have a c/section.

I met with the consulting Dr, who I found to be very informative and who seemed happy for me to choose how I want to birth my baby. He laid it all out on the table for both options but I found that it made me think that trialling a VBAC is the option I want to go with. So now, I am confused. I would love to try VBAC but am scared because how do I know which Dr is telling me the truth... What if I make a decision that is dangerous to both myself and my baby??

I really don't want another c/section, and because of all this conflicting information, DH is totally against me going natural and has got his family all pushing me to have a c/section. (His mother even suggested I update my will and start to consider how my DH and DD would cope without me!!) That's ok for them to say that, it's not their birth, emotions or recovery time.

I had also enquired with a Doula who specialises with VBAC but DH also thinks this is completely unnecessary. I am concerned that he will be in the delivery room pushing for me to succumb to a c/section when I don't really need (or want) it.

What do I do????????????????????? If there's any other women out there who have been through this or have any advice on VBAC, I'd love to hear from you... Sorry it's so long!

Whatever decision you make Amanda, it needs to be yours - no one elses. Definately look into a doula or a private midwife.

[christy]

Amanda, have you read any books into VBAC's? There are a few that helped me: "A Thinking Woman's Guide to Better Birth" and "Silent Knife". I found them both very informative & helpful in making my decision and preparing for my decision.

Doula's are invaluable in the journey towards a VBAC.

Also, the other thing that helped me was hypnobirthing. Just learning to be calm & reassured. In doing hypnobirthing, my husband was totally convinced about natural birth.

*hugs* its a hard decision to make but like Samantha said, its you decision to make either way.

[krisp]

Amanda, like you I am hoping for a VBAC this time around. Whilst my DH supports my decision in part he is concerned for both me and the baby and just wants us both well and healthy at the end of the journey.

My DS was born by emergency CS after 14 hours of trying. He was in severe distress and the OB felt she couldn't leave it any longer. I couldn't get past 8 cm dilation so a CS was done through my tears. I also had to have a general anasthetic as the spinal didn't work but that's a whole other story...

The OB I have now (we've moved states) is wonderful and is totally supportive of my decision to have a VBAC. She says there is no reason I won't be successful this time around and I am now just concentrating on that.

I talk to my baby each day and tell her not to be afraid that she and I will get through this experience together and she needs to trust in her Mummy that nothing bad will happen to her.

I know I can do it and that my body will do "it's thing" better this time as I'm prepared for the pain, I'm not afraid of it and I am going to listen to my body and do what I feel is right at the time. I'll keep moving (rather than laying on my back like last time), I'll stay at home in the comfort and security of my own environment as long as possible (unlike last time), I'll not be swayed by the midwives too much, it's my body and I and only I know what I'm feeling and I'm not scared (unlike last time).

In the end I intend on giving it my all and allowing my body the freedom and time to birth my baby as I want to.

BUT, if in the end my baby is truely in danger then I'll say I did my best and allow my Dr to do her job and bring my baby to me healthy and safe with no regrets.

[Sarah_H]

It's tough isn't it, especially seeing as you have a medical condition that some Drs are saying is ok for VBAC & others are saying it's not. One of our ex mods (Linda) was told it was risky to have a vaginal birth due to a medical condition, so had her first daughter via C/S. She changed OBs with her second daughter, still had the medical condition but had her VBAC a few months ago with no problems. The condition was different to yours but can show that with the right Dr supporting you it can be possible.

What are DH's concerns? Is there any way to alleviate them do you think? Maybe show him some of the info that Kelly has posted about VBACs (here). There are some great resources there & they'll help get you psyched for a VBAC if that's the way you choose to go.

What is the Dr's biggest concern? The heart condition or the tail bone injury? Surely if it's the heart condition, there can be monitoring of some sort done on your heart during labour & a C/S performed if any emergency issues arrive n that regard.... Or if it's the tail bone injury, I wonder if it might not even be an issue at all.

Dunno just some thoughts I had when reading your post.....

Good luck hun, it's such a difficult choice to make & of course you're the only one that can make it. Hopefully once you have your decision made DH & your medical carers accept it & support you 100%

[Adnil]

Amanda - I was like you - couldn't stop thinking about a VBAC 2nd time around. And as Sarah said, with a change of OBs, my entire thinking also changed.

When deciding, do keep in mind that if you do VBAC, they will monitor you very closely, and they can be very quick to deliver by C/S if something does 'go wrong'. So don't be too scared about it. I really think that to be informed & not scared is important. The more I learned about VBACs the more confident I became.

Also - Doula's are fantastic! It is important your DH is happy with it though, so maybe let him help decide on one?

Good luck with your decision. Having my VBAC was the best thing for me. I hope you can get the support you need to find the right thing for you.

[hoobley]

I don't know about the personal side of VBAC/c-section birth, i just wanted to reassure you about one aspect.

I know of (i really need to stop greeting strangers with "Hi, I'm Beccy, how was your birth!?"!) a woman, she's the sister of one of the women at my toddler group. She went into labour with #2 at home, was doing fine, decided to pop along to see how she was getting on after a few hours of contractions. On the way there in the carpark in fact, at 4.13am, her waters broke. At 4.21am she was examined and found to have cord prolapse, a life-threatening condition for bubs. Baby boy (little flat at birth, Apgars 3 and 7, but perfectly healthy now) was delivered at 4.43am. She spent the time between the exam and the birth on knees and chest, was given general and delivered immediately. That was at night too! They can be THAT quick when need be.

We all hear how keen Obs often are to take the option of c-sections when even non-critical issues present - if your Ob says you can VBAC and you want to VBAC then i reckon you GO FOR IT GIRL!

Bx

[Amanda_Jane78]

Thanks ladies!

I went and saw my GP tonight. She has been a family friend for a long time and knows my entire medical history. I wanted to discuss with her my options and what the Dr had told me and see what her thoughts were.

She agrees that with my history and being a VBAC, that I will be monitored very closely if I trial labour. She has indicated though that she doesn't believe I should go past my due date as she is concerned that the "unknown" factors such as my heart, pelvis and the fact it is a VBAC may cause an issue if I have not gone into labour by my due date. She has suggested I consider the option of a c/section on 30th November if I have not gone by then. I guess it's all about being mentally prepared for both, which I think I am... well as much as one can prepare oneself for the complete unknown DH seems very happy with this. His concerns I think were raised by his mother suggesting I start thinking about my will and putting negative thoughts in his head (she used to be a nurse so she thinks her opinion is the medical opinion we should all follow!!) He actually seems very excited at the thought of a VBAC now!

Thanks for your thoughts and advice... Fingers crossed for a successful VBAC, but am okay if I have to go c/section too... Ultimately, I just want a happy and healthy mummy and baby at the end of it all...

Thanks again to all!

[Adnil]

That's great Amanda! So glad your DH is getting excited too.

[BellyBelly]

Amanda, I am no doctor but I am surprised that a normal, healthy process like vaginal birth can cause your heart problems to get worse when a possible outcome of a c/s is a heart attack. I have heard of women arresting on the table during c/s. But again I am no doctor so even more reasons for you to do your own research based on studies, evidence and facts - but you need to get them from the right place. The internet is a scary thing for medical info sometimes!

Here are some BellyBelly articles:

Small Pelvis? Here's The Truth About Cephalopelvic Disproportion (CPD)
Big Baby? Then You Must Read This Article...

And I also love Christy's advice - Doula/Independant Midwife/Hypnobirthing or Calmbirthing/Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth and Silent Knife.

CPD or the small pelvis thing is extremely rare. Babies are designed to grow to a size that will fit in our pelvis - how else would our population be in the numbers it is? It's often used as an excuse for a malpositioned or posterior baby - but can you imagine your Ob telling you, 'Oops sorry, you didn't really need that but it's all over now so... '

[Amanda_Jane78]

Thanks Kelly,

I have been researching and am totally agreeing with you... The risks on my heart are greater with a c/s. Not only the risk of going into arrest, but also the risk of infection which is something I have always got to be extra careful with...

I'm going VBAC! I really don't believe I should have ever had a c/s with DD and really regret not investigating my options back then, but I was only just 20 years old and a little naiive... Everything is crossed now that it will be successful!!

P.S. Thanks for your articles... Sometimes it is so hard to find the information you are looking for and BB always seems to have exactly what you need!

[Adnil]

That's fantastic Amanda!! I know how it feels once you make the decision & wonder why you didn't do the same last time. I'm so happy for you!! You'll be great!

[Sarah_H]

Awesome news Amanda, how exciting

[becmc]

Just wanted to wish you a great vbac Amanda!!!
I see you are calling your dd Abbey Rose, my little girl is Abbey Lee!
Enjoy the rest of your pregnancy and don't worry about the birth, your body will do what it needs to!

My husband is the cautious type who also wants me to have a repeat C-Section rather than VBAC. Its a really hard situation as the information available suggests there is very little extra risk with VBAC - but I know that if anything happens to me or the baby he will blame me and my decision. So far I'm just trying to collect as many medical articles on the safety of VBAC so that he can see that my opinion is reasonable and valid. I also am thinking of a Doula - because I will need some support in labour and don't know how I'll get through it if my main support person thinks it shouldn't be happening in the first place. But I do understand where he's coming from - he loves both me and the baby and would be absolutely devastated if something happened to either of us. I bring the subject up periodically and I think he is starting to come round - I think the medical statistics are helping.

I don't know if this has been any help at all. I guess all I can say is that I really feel for you and hope that you manage to arrive at a decision which you have both agreed on. I hope he comes round. Maybe get your Dr. (who thinks you can VBAC) to sit down and talk to him. If he's anything like my hubbie, the opinion of a trained medico is worth far more than anything I could ever tell him. Best wishes for the birth.

[philippa.sdoula]

When I was convincing my husband to be ok (not allow he had no choice I am afraid) with my second VBAC to be at home, I had to say to him "Do you really belive that I would spend 18mths trying to get you to have another baby only to risk our lives doing something dangerous? I need you to trust me to do what is best for me and the baby, I love us too! If you want to have a say DH you need to do the research and come up with some good reasons for me not too. If you dont do that then I am the expert in this relationship so I decide." He woke up a little then and realised that I was not infact an idiot, not a big risk taker, not irrisponsible. He decided to trust me, besides he hates reading!

Just another way of thinking.

[Amanda_Jane78]

Well... I'm shattered... it's not going to happen. My BP is way too high, even on medication so the Dr's have booked me in for Tuesday 20/11/07.

Thank you all for your encouragement! I felt so like my body could handle this, but have been hospitalised three times in the last couple of weeks with high BP and being monitored for pre-eclampsia. I always said if it was a medical decision I would be ok with it, but still a little disappointed. oh well, 4 days and I'll have my beautiful baby girl with me...

[Adnil]

Amanda, at least you can be confident that you have researched this & did all you could. I can understand your disappointment, but like you said, soon you will have your baby in your arms. I hope you recovery is swift.