Zachary - our boy born sleeping

[Nadine]

I am so sorry for your loss Look after yourself and I am sending you lots of strength to get through this very hard time in your life

[Deejoy17]

I am so very sorry for your loss, the girls here are wonderful. Look after yourself

[blueiris]

I'm so sorry for your loss of your beautiful baby boy Zachery .
I can't even begin to imagine what you must be going through. All i can do is offer you my condolences. Your post has brought tears to my eyes.

I'm so glad you have a wonderful support network around you right now. Take care.

[Zachary's Mom]

Thank you to everyone who has been in touch. I appreciate all your kind words and support.

I am just having a bad day today and feel like writing is the only thing I can turn to. I started back at work this week (just for 2 days a week for a while to get back into the swing of things).It was really hard as I am in the financial industry and had to work with the public all day. The hardest thing for me was that it seemed like wherever I went there were crying babies and I couldn't handle it. I was an emotional wreck all day (which was embarrassing for me at work).

WILL THIS PAIN EVER GO AWAY? AM i EVER GOING TO FEEL NORMAL AGAIN? WILL THERE EVER BE A DAY WHEN I DON'T CRY?

This pain feels like more than I can bear. All I want is my little boy in my arms!

Sorry to go on - I am just really blue today.

Love to all

[blueiris]

Theresa,

to you hun. All you can do is take it all day by day. I wish i could take away your pain right now. Just know we are all here wheneer you need to talk,vent,scream whatever it is you need.

Take care

[Zachary's Mom]

Thank you so much. It helps to know there are kind people like you in this world. Thanks for your message on my profile page. I don't know how to reply to that message (I am a bit technically challenged :-)

Hope you are okay and looking after yurself.

[squidipa]

hi Zachary's mom,

i am so so deeply sorry for your loss.I have no answers as to why this happened its so unfair. BB has great support. i wish i could take some of that pain away. I am sorry to you and your family. I am sorry you lost a beautiful son! I cant even begin to imagine what your going through and now waiting on results oh sweety I am sorry i can only imagine if 4 weeks ago i lost my son. You are so brave to come and share with us thank you!

[Zachary's Mom]

Thank you - and congratulations on the birth of your little boy - he is beautiful.

[tali]

I too am sorry for your loss....

Please never feel sorry for writing whats in your heart.... This is what we on BB are here for..... So let it all out .... Cry scream and tell us all your hurt and pain.... with time I hope we can help you through your darkest days.....

[squidipa]

Thank you Zachary's mom for you congrats. I dont know where you find the time to thank ppl with everything on your plate i guess its something to do to keep your mind a bit more busy.

[blueiris]

Zachery's mom ~ How are you doing hun,been thinking about you.

[Aphrael]

I'm so sorry you lost your precious Zachary, it really breaks my heart

Beck

[Zachary's Mom]

Thank you for your thoughts.

[Zachary's Mom]

I am okay. I am back at work but just 2 days a week for a little while. I will go back fulltime in October. Every day is a struggle with something new usetting me all the time. I find it so hard when we had planned a future and I keep thinking of things I should be doing with Zachary. The smallest things can set me off crying - it is so frustrating. I miss him sooooo much. Thanks for thinking of me. How are you?

[blueiris]

I'm ok hun. I can't imagine how hard this is for you,all you can do is take it all 1 day at a time. How's your partner doing? Have you looked into finding a support group maybe to talk with others that know the pain you're feeling? Just thought hun.

Take care of yourself

[Zachary's Mom]

Well - yesterday Zachary would have been 3 months old. It was a bad day for me. I have also just got out of hospital after having my gall bladder removed (from gall stones that developed during my pregnancy). So I have been feeling very sorry for myself.

I still wonder why this has happened to us?!?! We wanted our little boy so much. I keep trying to imagine what he would have been like but I just can't picture it - which upsets me even more! I seem to be heading into a slump again. Hating the world and finding it hard to see anyone with children. I feel so guilty about my friends who have recently have babies as I want nothing to do with them at the moment. I just can't share in tyheir joy. I don't wish anyone ill thoughts, I just can't share in their joy when we have lost our son.

We are looking at ytrying again once I recover from this recent surgery but at the same time I am petrified! I guess I will deal with that one when it happens.

Hope you are all ytaking comfort from each other and your families.

Theresa

[diannescruffy]

Hi hun,
The pain of losing our precious angels never goes away but somehow we learn to deal with that pain and it gets easier day by day. Keep your precious memories of your little Zachary close to you.

Take care,
Dianne

[jackrose]

Hi Zachary's Mum,

Just wanted to drop you a line to see how you are doing. I have been thinking about you.