sad and unhappy

[laluna]

Hello to everyone in bellybelly land. These forums have been a big part of my life this year and a constant source of inspiration when I am feeling like nothing seems to be going according to plan. I thought it was time to join and offer up my story. I had a miscarriage at 10.5 weeks on 13/08/08 and today started bleeding, went for an ultrasound and was told that it was a failed pregnancy. So it is off for another curette next week- yuk! I am feeling sad and unhappy and starting to wonder if having a baby was ever meant to be. I would love to hear from others who have gone through a similar experience.

[~Trish~]

I'm so sorry for your losses . I have had two losses, but I've also had two beautiful boys so don't ever give up hope. I'm so sorry you have to go through this again. My thoughts and prayers are with you .

[laluna]

thanks Trish for your kind words! I guess it's one day at a time at the moment.

[diannescruffy]

Hi,
I'm so very sorry for your losses. I too have had two losses but have four beautiful children. Take one day at a time and I really hope it happens for you soon.

Regards,
Dianne

[BekZ]

Hugs sweety. Sorry to hear of your losses. I have had 2 mc and I have two daughters...there is hope

[laluna]

Thanks everyone for your words of support and encouragement. Woke up this morning feeling really crappy and crampy. Still can't believe this is all happening. MA (husband) and I feel as though we keep hitting brick walls. and are both feeling really down. Have been reading about 'failed' pregnancies and they are known as a blighted ovam. I had never heard of them before and apparently there is only a 2% chance of having one!!!!! This adds to the frustration and sadness.

[MistyFying]

laluna I'm very sorry for your loss. Be kind to yourself as you grieve and heal

[kristi14]

So sorry to hear of your losses.

I hope you can have some happiness soon

[sryan]

Hi Laluna,

I know exactly how you feel, I have had 3 miscarriages, 2 were blighten ovums (natural conception) and 1 I had a heartbeat at 7 weeks, 4 days (IVF bubs) and stopped growing after that.

But please dont give up, I am currently 14 weeks pregnant from a natural conception and bubs is growing well.

Sometimes it takes us ladies a little more time and a lot more heartbreak, but when we get to hold our little bubs in our arms, we will appreciate how much they are miracles.

xxx Sue xxx

[laluna]

Sryan,
It is so good to hear your story- thank you! It's wonderful to know that everything is going well for you. It gives great hope. All the best.

[chepie]

hi laluna,

Hun I am so very sorry for the loss of your beautiful angel... give yourself and hubbie too time to greive, get angry, yell at the world, cry whatever you need to. I had an ectopic pregancy in 2006 - lost my right tube and almost my life BUT we went on to have Aiden .... so there is hope and I know that it sux when they that there is 2% of it happening (I was told ectopic's are a 4%) ....

Sending you hugs babe xx

[laluna]

I am feeling confused today. Yesterday went in for curette and was told I had had a miscarriage- an early one. When I went for my scan on Monday they told me it was a blighted ovum and there was no baby. Yesterday was told by my ob. that there was a baby at some stage but they just couldn't see it. I'm not sure what is going on? Feeling frustrated and very confused. Is a miscarriage a name they give to all pregnancies? Anyone had anything similar?

[chris]

Hi Laluna
I am sorry to hear of your loss.
U/S are not 100% reliable. Especially when looking at something sooo small. During the D & C your Gyn has found that there was a baby and that you didn't have a blighted ovum. Sometimes it takes a little while for our body to realise that the baby has passed away.
I was told that my baby died the week b4 I miscarried. But I know some women who have been told that the baby had died around 2 weeks before they miscarried.

I hope I have helped. Being confused can do your head in, and your going through enough with out having to be confused about what happened.

Take time to heal, you have been through so much. Take every day as it comes.
I had a very bad experience and had alot of complications after my MC. I had basicaly given up on getting preg but I did.

Take care
Chris

[LuluHB]

I'm so sorry for your lost babies Laluna. It does feel like you're hitting a wall doesn't it. It could well be that your baby was too tiny to be picked up when you went in for your scan, and so the blighted ovum diagnosis. Feelings of frustration, helplessness and hopelessness are really normal so please don't give yourself a hard time about it. You and your DH should give yourselves time to grieve for your lost baby and for what might have been. My first three pregnancies ended in two miscarriages and one ectopic pregnancy. My fourth and fifth pregnancies ended in my two beautiful daughters. So please don't give up hope. It is so damn hard finding the strength and the courage to try again but when you are ready you'll know.

[SallyJ]

Sorry for your loss. I don't think the u/s techs always know what to call it - I was told I had a blighted ovum, when it was clear that there was a [dead] baby on the screen of about 8 weeks gestation (I was supposed to be 12 1/2 weeks)

Sadly m/c of any variety are very common, but most women who m/c eventually become pg. I hope that happens for you sooner rather than later

[laluna]

Thank you everyone for sharing your stories with me. It certainly helps to know that there are other women who have gone through similar experiences and had a positive outcome. To everyone who is still trying to have a baby..... we have to have faith. My thoughts are with you all.